Date: 07/26/15 10:05 pm Title: Chapter Nineteen
I just read this entire story in one sitting, and I cannot give you enough praise for keeping me hooked and leaving me wanting more for the better part of my Sunday!
Your ability to pace in these chapters is absolutely divine. I feel myself getting wrapped up in Avery's impatience for Klaus to be intimate with her, but her impatience permeates in me as well. I look so forward to seeing these two take new steps in their relationship that I find myself wanting to rush, but both Klaus and your writing remind me how joyous and fun the journey is in this relationships and all that happens.
And so much has happened. You've made Klaus' air of mystery have so much more life and depth! I love how you've tied he and Avery to the city, and I love the idea of him with a tattoo!
Your characterizations are so exciting to read. I love that you haven't just given everyone their scripted dialogue and used it as the sole basis of this fic. You've added so much thought and care into every interaction that it's hard not to feel like a member of the town looking in to the happenings around me. I LOVE how you've written Marian and he and Klaus' past!
I still do feel like Klaus is hiding something, even though the reader is quelled over with his love and Raeger and Lillie's shenanigans, so I look forward to reading more! Thank you so much for your lovely story and writing!
Now that is some dedication! lol... I'm so glad to hear the story's been able to keep you enthralled all day, but I certainly hope there weren't others things you needed to get done! ;)
Don't worry, Klaus and avery will get there... eventually. Just to give you a heads-up, though: There will be some more juciness coming up in a couple of chapters.
I can't take full credit for Klaus' backstory, since some of it (the part about him being a gang leader) was in the game. You have to religiously watch the TV to catch it, but it's on one of the shows that airs on... Sundays, I believe.
The scripted dialogue is a good jumping-off point, but there are some parts that really bug me about certain flower events in this game - especially Klaus' pink flower event. Out of all of them, I think that's the one I changed the most - not counting the omitted yellow flower event, which instead was the inspiration for the horse-riding incident.
Finally: Your instincts are right on about Klaus. You'll just have to keep reading to find out what's going on, though. ;)
Thanks for reviewing! :)
Date: 07/12/15 03:19 pm Title: Chapter Nine
I just absolutely love Marian XD He's so much fun! And gosh I can just easily see him in this situation, it's so fantastic *heart* You write him so well, I love it!
And Klaus getting advice from Raegar lol Well he has to start somewhere I guess. Will you be pairing off anyone else? It seemed like you were sort of hinting at Lillie/Raegar but wasn't sure if you were going to do anything like that. Just asking!
FWEEEE! The first date! So exciting x3 Shame on Marian for trying to make Avery seem too sexy lol Klaus won't be able to control himself! But hey, that's okay with me... hur hur hur.
Love it, as always! And yeah I know what you mean when reviewers are like HURRY AND POST AGAIN! I'll usually say like I can't wait for the next update, but I don't mean that in the I LITERALLY CAN'T WAIT SO UPDATE ALREADY way haha. It just means I'm excited! ^^ So like I said, take your time. I will be here whenever you pop in~!
EEEE So excited!!!
lol... I apprently have a knack for writing the stereotypical drag queen, I guess. Then again, he's one of my favorites so if I didn't write him well I'd feel bad.
Yes, I'm definitely hinting at something between Raeger and Lillie. They're actually the only unofficial rival couple (paired up on the fans based on where people stand during festivals) that I ship. However, they're not going to get any of the complete spotlight... but there will be some additional things regarding them and their relationship with one another throughout the story.
The first dare is actually three chapters long, because if I hadn't broken it up it would have been one overly HUGE chapter! Hopefully, it won't take too long to get each part validated, so you won't have long to wait between them. ;)
Date: 07/11/15 12:18 pm Title: Chapter Eight
YUSSSSSSSSSSSS FINALLYYYYY! Oh I am so happy they finally came to terms with everything! Good for them XD Poor Fritz though lol Hopefully he's not scarred for life! Now we get to see how everyone else reacts to this too, hehe.
And now that they're together, Klaus will have a harder time controlling himself...mwahaha. YOU CANNOT IGNORE HER FOREVER KLAUS. JUST GIVE INNNNN.
Oh boy I can't wait x3 And no worries about needing to write some more! I know how it is~ Take your time! I will be patient :) Great work my friend!!!
At least Fritz didn't actually catch them kissing! He just figured it out. And don't worry, their meddling friends will have their say in things before they get to go on that first date. ;)
I'm assuming you've figured out who her cousin is marrying. Avery and Klaus will be attending the wedding later on in the story, so it'll be a nice little crossover/setup for the next HM story I'll be writing after this one.
Thank you for being patient! One of my pet peeves is when people constantly post reviews like, "OMG MOAR PLZ!" - especially when they post multiple reviews just like that but with slightly different wording on the same chapter every other day. It's like, hello? I have a life, ya know? lol... Like right now, my downstairs bathroom is completely gutted because we're remodelng. So I definitely appreciate you being so understanding and willing to wait. :)
Date: 07/10/15 12:27 pm Title: Chapter Seven
Ugh! What is it with men and working themselves to the point of exhaustion? Tsk tsk. Good thing Avery found him and Marian was able to help! I am curious what he looks like without his face though... Hmmmmm!
And sneaky Klaus! Listening in. Well hopefully after Marian's speech he'll finally listen! What a sad story though :( So he's just worried about getting his heart broken again...poor Klaus! IT WILL BE OKAY! AVERY WILL LOVE YOUUUU!!!!
EEEE every chapter is always so good and you always leave me wanting more x3 well at least I don't have to wait long usually :P hehe. Keep up the wonderful work!
Marian without his face looks like... A man! lol... Sorry, I couldn't resist.
Klaus already knew all about what happened with Avery's dad when she was a kid, and Raeger clued him in about her feelings, so it's not like he was really eavesdropping. He's just being stubborn! And yes, the poor guy got his heart broken but Avery does love him and he needs to just accept it!
I'm glad you're enjoying the story so much. I'm posting the chapters as soon as I can, depending upon how long the current one takes to get validated. Once I hit 17, they'll be spaced out a bit more because I'll need to actually write them.
Date: 07/10/15 12:09 pm Title: Chapter Six
This part in the game was so sad! :( I totally didn't see it coming... Boo hoo! :'( you wrote the part well though and i like how you added the part with Eda talking about Klaus. Makes it fit with the story better :) and Klaus! Such a sweetie bringing her flowers~
Though goodness he certainly can be pretty scary when he wants to be! O.O I was scared for Raeger myself lol But uh oh now that Klaus knows, what will he do? HMMMM. Also I understand him being concerned about Avery but still... Poor Raeger getting ambushed like that :( Klaus can be mean lol
Loving these fast updates haha. So wonderful!!! And I'm glad to hear you're covering more after they get together and marriage and stuff. Cuz the good stuff doesn't end when they get together! That's nice to hear x3 can't wait! CITRUSY STUFF IS COMING SOOOOOOON!
Klaus' old thug life decided to peek out a bit, lol... Plus he's one of those overprotective types. I feel sorry for the guys who go after his daughters! (Not really, though, since I have that all figured out already and while one of them is kinda iffy the other is so incredibly sweet and awkward that there's no way Klaus would ever see him as a threat.) Plus, he knows what Raeger is like since he used to be like him when he was younger, so he's basically taking out some of his inner self-loathing on the poor kid. :(
Date: 07/10/15 08:37 am Title: Chapter Five
BWAAAAA AGATE I COULD KILL YOU! Lol when I read the HEY I was like NOW WHAT IDIOT WOULD RUIN THIS?! But I should've known haha. Poor Avery and Klaus! So close too! T.T
I still haven't gotten very far in the game so I dunno how in depth it goes but I really like the backgrounds you give everyone. From Avery's close family to Klaus' selfless need to bring everyone happiness.... Even if he is a perv lol But everything you come up with fits their personalities and I love that. Very well done :)
And Klaus has a tattoo! He really was a bad boy tee her...I wonder what it is~? And wet white shirt? Mm-mmm...lucky girl.
But they're getting closer to being open with everything! I hope so at least...but you say it'll be like 40 chapters so we definitely have a way to go! I'm so excited x3 you definitely have a fan for the ride, my friend! I love it!
Oh, this won't be the only interruption they'll have to endure, lol... It's just the first of many. (Please don't kill me!)
Klaus was canonically a bad boy in his youth. One of the shows you can watch on your TV in the game profiles various townspeople, and the episodes about Klaus have some surprising revelations in them. I'll be touching more on that later, though, so I'm not going to tell you what happened in case you haven't seen it. The tattoo was my own little addition, and you will eventually find out what it looks like.
The reason the story will end up being so long is I'm not stopping once they finally get together. They're going to have some ups and downs and obstacles to deal with together before finally settling down - and then the challenges of adjusting to married life and being new parents. The ending is set to be on their first wedding anniversary.
Date: 07/08/15 06:57 pm Title: Chapter Four
UGH! I am right there with you. I was so disappointed with the music festival! I was like...uhhh IS ANYTHING GOING TO HAPPEN? But no :c But you did wonderfully with it! I liked that you added dancing...made it much more enjoyable! And oh goodness I just love how everyone is in on it to get the two of them together lol MAYBE THEY'LL FIGURE IT OUT EVENTUALLY!
I know I said it before but I like how you characterize everyone lol I like Iris a lot too! I was always jealous in game like YOU TWO HAVE SOMETHING GOING ON!!!! Especially when I saw the two of them walking in from out of town together. I was like, And just what are YOUUUU two doing?!? So meh DX But hey maybe Avery could get jealous of them like Klaus is of Raeger. MWAHAHA. Nah but I like Iris so you're doing well. I like her friendly nature and the fact she's helping Klaus too. EVERYBODY IS IN ON IT!!!
I love this and am so excited. I'm so glad you're updating fast XD I CAN'T WAIT FOR MOREEEEEE *heart*
You know, one of my least favorite parts in the game was how your character reacts to the situation in Klaus' pink flower event. It's like... "Really? You're going to get all upset just because they 'look good together'?" So damn stupid. Which is why I have a plan to tackle things a little bit differently so that it will actually make sense for Avery to get upset upon seeing them being all cozy together.
I like Iris, especially a certain little part of her interview on the TV that inspired me to add in something later to this story. Don't worry, though - the only trouble she is going to cause for their relationship is... Ha! You thought I would telll, didn't you? You're just going to have to wait and see! :p
Date: 07/08/15 06:31 pm Title: Chapter Three
BAHHHHHHAHHAHAA Good ol' Raegar XD So conniving lol Good for him for putting thoughts into Klaus' head. Hopefully that'll spur him on somewhat! Poor Klaus....maybe he'll figure it out eventually. FWEEEE I can't wait for more!
Wow, 17 chapters! WE HAVE A WAY TO GO! So exciting x3 And hooray for citrusy things! Definitely excited for those when they come...hur hur...
Well I'm glad you at least have Rune Factory! If you get a chance you should get back into it. I really love the characters, and yeah the dialogue is really good. Plus they have dates with the bachelors/bachelorettes and those are just fun XD Some are so cute! I loved every part about that game. Do you like RPGs? I mean you must at least a little bit if you have the game lol But yeah I would definitely give it another try if you have time! ^^
Raeger is a bit of a womanizing ass, but he cares about his friends and since Marian is also Klaus' best friend, it was bound to happen those two would end up teaming up to get their best friends together. Klaus has already figured things out at this point, he's just in denial, lol.
Seventeen chapters so far. I'm estimating... 30-40 by the time I'm finally done, maybe more. The most recent chapter I wrote marked the first taste of citrus.
I am definitely an RPG fan. Dragon Age: Origins is one of my favorite games ever (been working on a novelization of my own playthrough of that game, as well), and I also love the Witcher series and got the third game recently for my birthday, along with a fancy new gaming laptop to play it on. I may pick up RF4 again at some point, but right now I'm overhwlemed with all the other games I'm currently playing (SoS, Arkham Knight, Witcher 3, etc.).
Date: 07/08/15 06:10 am Title: Chapter Two
Oh no! You updated before I had a chance to review! Sorry! X.X but anyway I love how you kinda show it from both points of view, so you know what both are thinking. It's always frustrating xuz it's like YOU FOOLS DON'T YOU SEE YOU FEEL THE SAME?! I love it lol
I really like how you characterize Marian. He's so fun XD I don't know if you've played Rune Factory 4 but it's like Porcoline...he's super weird but for some reason those characters are so likable!
I actually like how you characterize everybody. I was disappointed in the dialogue in this game since I just came from RF4 which has MUCH better dialogue. So it's kind of hard to know how people act in some situations. But I have to say you're doing very well and I love how everyone is. I like how Klaus is a closet perv...hur hur hur...
Speaking of are you going to have a lemon at some point? I hope so! We must see how this turns out!!!
And uh oh now Marian knows...should be interesting to see what he does with that information! He said it was confidential but will he tell Klaus?! What will happen?! I must know~
Anyway keep up the great work! Off to read the next chapter!
lol! No worries! Updates will be coming pretty quick right now, since I'm trying to get caught up on here with posting all the chapters I currently have written (17, so far). Read and review at your leisure! :)
Yes, Klaus is a closet perv, even in the game! Between the whole purple flower event scene with him and the comments he makes to you at the Music Festival after you start dating him, he's easily a "horny old man."
I've only played RF4 for an hour or two. Oddly enough, I bought it when I upgraded to the New 3DS earlier this year so I had a new game to play on it then hardly touched it in favor of some older games I'd played the crap out of already. Still, I can see what you mean. EVen in that short amount of time, there was a lot more dialogue than in any Harvest Moon game I've ever played. Then again, Rune Factory is more of an RPG title while Harvest Moon is a straight farming simulator, so it kind of makes sense that there would be more dialogus and deeper character development.
Finally, to answer one of your earlier questions: Yes, there will be a few chapters of strong citrusy content spinkled throughout the story. ;)
Date: 07/04/15 08:40 am Title: Chapter One
Hooray! A Story of Seasons story! XD Klaus was my second choice after Raegar (predictably I know...but his "I'm too old for you" got...old after awhile lol). It sucks Raegar's dialogue is bugged though D: NOOOO!
Anyway I'm really enjoying this so far! I like Raegar's flirty best friend personality x3 I also like how Klaus is trying so hard to stay innocent but has a hard time keeping his thoughts straight haha.
I liked that she was allergic to lavender and he uses it most of the time! I could just feel his disappointment! :( Poor Klaus. It added a nice touch though so that was nice to see x3
Anyway hope you write more soon! It's nice to see the mildly dirty side of Klaus ;D
Oh, also you have this marked as Spoilers... Can you point out where they are when you get there? I'm at the end of my first year (so one major spoiler has already happened of course) but I just want to be aware of any others if possible x3 Is this a mini fic (like only 3-5 chapters) or will it be a longer one? Just curious how long you're going :)
Anyway, keep up the great work! I love it ^^
Raeger was actually my first choice (I have a weakness for men who can cook) but as soon as I met Klaus, I totally fell for him. A pervy gentleman with dark hair who doesn't look like a little kid (I'm looking at you, Mistel and Fritz)? Yes, please! If you stick with him, he eventually gets over the age difference - unlike a certain other bachelor in A New Beginning. I married him, and I don't think he's mentioned the age difference once since his reverse proposal. Even in that case... well, you'll see. ;)
I will certainly be adding a spoiler warning to the specific chapter in question, but don't worry: You're already seen the part my tag is there for.
So far, I've written 15 chapters for this story, and it's still got quite a few chapters left to go. Hope you'll continue to be along for the ride!
Thanks for reviewing! :)